RIP Cory Monteith

My heart is aching as i'm typing this post. I still can't believe that he's gone. Initially, I laughed to myself when i saw the twits on Twitter since Twitter is so famous for killing people who are still breathing, healthy and alive. But then when i opened my Facebook, the first post that i saw was from Straits Times news, reporting about the death of Cory Monteith. I kept thinking to myself. If it's an  official statement / news from trusted news website, then it must be true so I kept searching on the net and yes, IT IS TRUE. I really don't expect him to go so soon. So far, the police have yet to confirm the cause of death but people are already guessing that it is due to drug overdose. He's been having drug related problems since he was 13.

Well, we don't know the clear picture to why and how he resort to drugs back then so we HAVE NO RIGHTS to judge him. Not everyone leads a happy childhood. I've seen so many hatred remarks about Cory even after he have passed away. Come on guys. This is no time for judgemental and hatred remarks. The guy had already passed on. The least you could do is to pray for him, his family, friends and his girlfriend, Lea Michele. I feel sorry for Lea. I hope she is coping well although i know it is VERY DIFFICULT. Dear Lea Michele, please be strong for Cory's family, for yourself, for his fans and for your fans. I know it's gonna be really tough but please stay strong. It takes time to accept the fact but you will, one day.

To all the other celebrities out there, please stay safe. There's just been too many cases of death due to drug overdose. We cannot bear to see anymore celebrities die due to drug overdose anymore. Treasure your lives. Spare a thought on your loved ones. If you need help, consult your loved ones or the specialists. Remember this, your life is precious.

Well, it's already 10pm now. I better head to bed. Doing the opening shift tomorrow. Goodnight crazy world.

RIP Cory Monteith. You'll always be remembered in our hearts and in our minds. Glee will never be the same without you.

Low

I wish that i could just replay the thoughts or things i never said.

You make me feel low, don't make me feel low

coz i tried so hard to convince myself it's okay to feel this way.

If i can't have you i'd be myself coz you know i need you so.

 

I know i'm late but Salam Ramadhan to all the Muslims all over the world! How have your Ramadhan been for all of you? So far, my Ramadhan is going on quite smoothly, alhamdulillah. Well, i've not been updating my blog for quite a long time. There are a few reasons as to why i've not been updating. Firstly, time constraint due to my busy schedule especially when i am already at the peak of my course. Secondly, i am lazy. Too lazy to update my blog. The thought of typing just makes me sleepy. Lastly, sadly, i've lost touch in blogging. It's sad. Blogging used to be my favourite past time, 6-7 years ago.

But anyway, let's see how much i can update in this post until my eyes give way. Oh, for your information, it's close to 10pm right now.

As i've mentioned earlier on, i am already at the peak of my course. Indeed i am at the peak of my course. Insyallah, if all goes well, i'll be completing my course by end of October. So can you foresee how busy i will get in the coming months especially for Practicum 3 & Practicum 4. It's going to be a tough journey but as a saying goes, "No pain, no gain".  According to the standard practices, students who have completed their course will be transferred out from the centre that they've been attached in. Upon transferring out, they will officially be given a class and be a form teacher for that particular class. Now this is the part where i am having mixed feelings about it. I am VERY excited to have my own class but on the other hand, i am very nervous, scared and worried. I don't know if i can handle and manage a class all by myself although i will have a chinese teacher as my partner but i am aware and i fully understand that NOT ALL PARTNERS are easy to work with. *gasps for air* Well, i think for now, i should not worry so much about that. I should focus on completing my course.

Good morning crazy world. It's almost 9am here in Singapore. I'm up so early today. Been up since 6am for no reason. -.- Gonna be another long day ahead for us today. Day 2. *Ting ting ting* Hahaha okay nonsense. Gonna head to our new house at Choa Chu Kang, check up on the renovation workers and the progress of our house and then we're off to buy our coach tickets for our vacation in KL and then we're off to Marina Square's Vans coz the sister wants to get her shoes. So yeap, long day ahead.

I'M SO EXCITED TO SEE MY ROOM ONCE THE PAINTERS HAVE COMPLETED PAINTING MY ROOM! I've seen the almost completed progress yesterday. They are only left with painting the stripes and they ARE DONE! Whoop whoop! My room is painted with a combination of 2 colours; pink and purple. I'll upload the picture of my room once i've fully furnished and decorated my room aite?

Gone

I'm back. Yes i am finally back with a new blog post after so long. The last time i updated was 2 months ago. Damn it's been so long! I've been pretty busy and preoccupied for the past few months. Busy with school, assignments and work. Recently, i've been very busy with packing for moving. Yeap, you saw that right. My family and i are shifting. I shall describe more about that in the later part of this post.

So what's up? I'm good just a little stress with school assignments but it's finally over for a short while and i'm free from individual assignment for at least 2 weeks. Phew! Past few weeks was INSANE! 2 individual assignments + 1 group assignment submissions were back to back plus we had an exam to revise for which we were only given a week to revise. Thank god that phase is over. Honestly speaking, i am excited to graduate so i will be free from annoying ASSignments but on the other hand, i don't want to graduate so soon because i don't think i am ready for commitment yet although i am pretty excited to have my own class of children. Yeah i am excited but feeling a little nervous and scared too because being a class teacher = having to work with parents. Not just children but with their parents and parents can be a pain in the ass too ya'know. That's what i am worried most. My sister said that it is perfectly fine and normal to feel that way because she felt the same way too probably about 3 years ago when she graduated from the same Diploma course as i am doing now. I just have to be optimistic, think positively and everything will be smooth. :) Insyallah, most probably, i'll be graduating from my course this October; mid October. So yeah, that's about school.

Let's move on to work. So in January, my Playgroup children were promoted to Nursery and my Principal pushed me up together with the children. I feel so blessed and thankful that my Principal gave me another year to work with the children because i am already so attached to these children that i just want to see them grow. I've seen some of them since they were in toddler and just look at how big they've grown now. THEY ARE GROWING UP SO FAST!  :') Do you know how lovely and wonderful it is to be working with children? The children are naturally pure and innocent. They don't judge you and they'll love you no matter what and how you look like. Do you know that children are very forgiving? They may get angry at you or their friends but they forgive and forget easily. They do not bear grudges. I guess that's ONE thing that ADULTS SHOULD LEARN. As a teacher, you don't only teach and educate them but you also learn valuable skills from the children. Valuable skills such as, being forgiving, have tolerance and patience, etc.

Recently, our company had a Company Staff Retreat at Universal Studios. A retreat that we Teachers need for working hard all this while. The society might think that preschool teachers' job is easy. Why don't you take a week off from your current job and have a week attachment in any of the preschool centres to have a feel of what we teachers do daily. I am not complaining about my job but i just feel that we deserve to be respected and recognized. That's all that we are asking for. Do you know that preschool teachers hold multiple roles? We are teachers, we teach and educate the children. We are their 2nd parents. We care for the children, we shower them with love and we teach them manners, etiquette and valuable life skills such as self-help skills. We are nurses because we administer medicine according to the time sheet. Some people even discriminate us teachers and label us as 'high class maids' because we change children's diapers, we clean them when they vomit and when they pass urine / motion. Please be mindful of what you say. I bet your lives would be hell without preschool centres and us teachers. So think before you speak. Thank you very much.

 

 Before the start of the fun filled day in Universal Studios, we had to sit in the convention centre for some activities and stuffs. 

CAMWHORE BEFORE ENTERING UNIVERSAL STUDIOS. Presenting to you, the lovely staff of Yung An Centre. <3>

Before the indoor roller coaster ride at The Mummy. I was so nervous and scared that i was this close to turning back and back out from the ride BUT I DID WENT ON THE RIDE. I SURVIVED IT ALTHOUGH I CRIED THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE RIDE. :D

After the indoor roller coaster ride and look at my face. I WAS STILL IN A STATE OF SHOCK, MY KNEES WERE STILL WEAK and my principal insisted in taking a picture with this fierce guy on stilts. HAHAHA.

Moving on to the topic of moving. As mentioned above, my family and i will be shifting. Yeap we are shifting house and we will be shifting in exactly 4 days. We will be shifting to a totally different neighbourhood; Choa Chu Kang. "Won't you miss your current neighbourhood?", the question asked by most of my friends. WHAT DO YOU THINK?! Of course i will miss my current neighbourhood. I've been spending my whole life in Bukit Batok. I grew up in Bukit Batok. There's too much memories here. My childhood memories especially. The neighbourhood where i spent most of my weekends with my childhood friends, playing at the void deck. Block catching, cycling and other activities. Feeling so sentimental as i am typing right now. I'm sure most of you are pondering why we are moving. Well it's coz we need more space. Both my sister and i are growing older, we are in the same career line, preschool teacher. Preschool teachers have their own collection of teaching aids and resources therefore we no longer can share a tiny room. I swear, if we could build an additional room in our current 3 room flat, WE DEFINITELY WOULD! On the other hand, i am very excited to move in to our Choa Chu Kang's house because I WILL GET A ROOM FOR MYSELF!

What i will miss:
- Bus stop: I will definitely miss my current house's bus stop because this bus stop is PERFECT because there are so many buses that are available for you to travel to almost any parts of Singapore as compared to the 1 pathetic bus available at the bus stop at our new house bus stop in Choa Chu Kang which is a feeder bus that'll take you to Choa Chu Kang's bus interchange. :(

- Walking back home: I'll definitely miss the short walk back home from West Mall to our current house as compared to the quite a distance walk back home from Lot One to our new house. :(

- Grandparents: My grandparents are currently staying with my aunt at Bukit Batok and it's just 2 stops away from my current Bukit Batok house. Shifting to Choa Chu Kang means away from them. I don't feel comfortable being away from them. :(

- Sharing room with my sister: I will DEFINITELY miss sleeping in the same room as my sister although i've been complaining about how much i hate sleeping in the same room as her. There are days where the both of us have some sort of insomnia and we cannot sleep so we just chat till late night which somehow bonded us and enhances our relationship.  :(

- Neighbours aka childhood friends: Yes i will miss my neighbours aka my childhood friends and their family. We've known each other for a lifetime okay. Sighs.  :(

Okay, i should stop with the list of what i will miss because it's making me feel depressed. It's been such a really long post. So sorry about that. I have lots more to talk about but i shall end this post here or you'll fall asleep by the end of my post if i were to continue with this post. hahahaha. KBYE. Thanks for reading though. Have a great day ahead guys!  :)

Emotional Awareness

Have you ever wonder if there's something wrong with you? I mean, have you ever suspected that you have a problem? Lately, i've been suspecting myself of having a problem so i went on to research and read up and so, i am much confident now that i really do have a problem in me.

I have a problem with Emotional Awareness, Opening Up to Love. I'm sure most of us have least difficulties in opening up to people but as for me, it is tough for me to open up my heart, mind and soul  to people even to my own family.

 You see, the thing is, yes i do show my care, concern and love to my friends. I do say, " I love you" to my friends. I do show my love to my friends but i don't do it to my family. But wait, that doesn't mean i don't love my family. I do. I really do love them so much. They are my world. They are my everything but it's just that i can't seem to show my affection and love towards them. I feel awkward. The word is just AWKWARD and i just can't bring myself to show affection in a visible manner. By visible manner, i meant by showing them the affection and care through verbal communication and touch. I just don't feel comfortable showering people with affection.

Sometimes i really do want to get affectionate with my family. At times i feel like hugging my parents, holding their hands, etc but then my mind will tell me to avoid it.

"Are you afraid to fall in love? Or does the thought of being loved by someone scare you?"  YES

Gosh, that phrase above really explains it all. I am afraid to fall in love and the thought of being loved by someone scares me.

"Tender feelings make us open and vulnerable. In order not to get hurt, we prefer to close up and not to feel"

It's true. In order not to get hurt, i prefer to close up and not to feel by avoiding. I have this fear in me. Fear of getting hurt. Fear of rejection. Fear that i am not good enough. Fear. The word is FEAR.

Low

Have you ever felt so pissed off, mad, angry and low for no reason? Have you ever felt so ugly that people around you are judging you? That is exactly what I am feeling right now. I hate this feeling.

We Don't Even Have To Try, It's Always a Good Time

"Friendship isn't about who came first & who you've known the longest. It's about who came & never left"

Favourite girls, swimming session, float, a whole hell lot of laughing like maniacs, black skin, sunburn, fun, body ache. That basically sums up my Wednesday. Swimming session with my favourite girls was extremely fun especially with a nearly empty swimming complex to ourselves. IT'S SO GOOD TO SWIM ON A WEEKDAY!

 On our way to Jurong East Swimming Complex! WELCOME TO JURONG! Alexis traveled all the way from Pasir Ris just to swim with us!

 

"AHH! My forehead, my forehead! It's exposed!" - Noreen Rozana. HAHAHAHA! :P

So, Jurong East Swimming Complex have changed SOOOO MUCH as compared to the last time i went there which was sooo many years ago! What i mean by change is just the toilet.  :P  They have renovated the toilet and i am really contented with their newly renovated toilet now. Way before they renovated, their toilet was really terrible, horrible and disgusting, and that was 1 of the reason why i hated going swimming there.  Their toilet floor was so black and dirty, even their walls was TERRIBLY HORRIBLY DIRTY! They better maintain the cleanliness of the newly renovated toilet.

Anyway, back to my amazing Wednesday. I had a lot of fun with The Trendsetters today. Oh, who is The Trendsetters? We label our group as The Trendsetters. Why? Hmm, i don't really know either. I can't even remember why we labeled ourselves that. Gotta check it out with the girls later! :D

So as usual, Thia being Thia, forever whining about the sun and how hot the weather is. Noreen, being Noreen, forever acting like a bimbo. :P But these 2 girls are really our entertainers. They always bring joy and laughter in our group and which is why i love them for once. :P But seriously, Thia and her fear of water is super cute. She enjoys going swimming but scared of water. She LOVES going to the beach but she DON'T LIKE the sun. See the irony in there? :P

Makcik Thia who loves the beach and swimming but hates the sun!  :D

Okay, i'm getting tired from the typing. Shall end the post here.

List of activities that i wanna do with my favourite girls:
1) Swimming session again but at Wild Wild Wet
2) LUGE AND SKYRIDE
3) Bowling session

New Year resolutions for 2013:
1) Gain self-confidence & self-esteem. Have more confidence in myself, love & accept myself for who I am.
2) Spend more time with my loved ones; family, friends & best friends
3) Lose weight, lead a healthy lifestyle
4) Do well for my Diploma & graduate
5) Start saving up
6) Travel to Bangkok
7) Travel with friends
8) Reduce cursing & swearing
9) If there's fate, meet the right guy & have a relationship
 
A friend once asked me a question which made me ponder,"How to gain self-confidence & self-esteem if you don't want to change your mindset?" The question is 101% logical and sensible. How to change when you yourself don't want to make a change? The question here is, who is the problem? Is it the people or it's the society which causes people to have low self-esteem? I feel that society this days is very judgmental. Don't you think so? Especially to plus size people. 

People tend to stare and humiliate plus size people. I've seen with my own eyes & heard with my own eyes, people who stare, humiliate and laugh at plus size people in front of their very eyes. Don't you people know that it is very rude & hurtful? Some people don't ask to be born that way. They don't have a choice because it might be genetics. You might even say, "If FAT, go EXERCISE & LOSE WEIGHT ah!" Wanna know a secret? It's the society that makes plus size people stop exercising because when they exercise, the society will again give the 'HAHAHA, YOU'RE SO FAT & UGLY STILL WANT TO EXERCISE" stare  and again humiliate them.Go to the gym? The gym is so full of fit people and again, the society will give the 'HAHAHA, YOU'RE SO FAT & UGLY STILL WANT TO EXERCISE" stare. 

The question is HOW NOW? How to increase self-esteem when the society is always so judgmental?  *think & ponder*

Sandtoesah Beach

Had a good chat with my Principal during appraisal that day. I still remember what she said, " If you are really passionate about your job, focus on your studies and work really hard on it and i'm sure you can go far". So for now, my main aim is to focus on my studies, study hard, do well and graduate.

School had been good, sometimes stressful, sometimes very fun and enjoyable. Well, it is not school if it's easy right? Nothing is easy in this world especially when it comes to education. My recent Play module lesson was held at Sentosa and I had a really great time with my class.

My class. The lovely ladies of DAF15.

When we got to Siloso Beach, we were told to build sandcastle but not just random sandcastle. We need to come out with a storyline before we build the sandcastle but humans being humans, always fickle minded, the plans will definitely change during the process of building. I never knew that making the perfect shapes out of the sandplay tools can be difficult. My team members and I had difficulty in moulding the shapes that we almost gave up. I guess we just suck at it. Even children can build nicer sandcastles. :( After building the sandcastle, we had to present to the class.

Our sandcastle! :D

 

 

The process of making our sandcastle. :)

My favourite girls, The Trendsetters.

So after building the sandcastle, our lecturer organized a SUPER FUN telematch. Class then ended after the telematch which was about 12.45pm so my favourite girls and I had the rest of the day to ourselves. We spent the rest of the day slacking, hanging out and sun tanning at the 2 beaches; Siloso and Palawan Beach. The weather was really good especially in the morning but it began to pour in the late evening. The rain was intermittent. It rained for a while, stopped, then it rained again and stopped again. Can you imagine how foolish we looked on that day? When it poured, we quickly took our belongings and picnic mat and run for the shelter. When the rain stopped, we went back out by the beach to sun tan again and a few minutes later, it poured again so we had to run and take shelter again.

 

After the 4th or 5th time that happened, we got annoyed that we just took our belongings and headed to the shower. Hahaha. But in short, I had a REALLY GOOD & AMAZING time with my favourite girls whom i love so much. 

ALL TIME LOW BAYBEH

 

ALL TIME LOW LIVE IN SINGAPORE ON 6TH MARCH 2013! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW EXCITED I AM RIGHT NOW! The last time they came to Singapore was 2 years ago and sadly, it was my worst concert experience. :'( We stood in the rain for about 1.5 hours before The Dirt Radicals took the stage for the opening act. When the boys of All Time Low came on stage, the crowd went wild. I was grinded & pushed to the side. I DIDN'T EVEN ENJOY MYSELF AT ALL. This year's concert better be good. I need to be in the first row, right at the barricade, right in front of Alex Gaskarth.

Rise & Shine!

Good morning earthlings! I love the fact that Blogger app is now compatible for iPad which enables me to update my blog much more frequently now. Thank god for that. The reason why I've not been updating my blog was actually, firstly, I've lost touch & the feeling to blog. Secondly, I have no time to spare to update my blog.

New Year Resolutions

We welcomed the New Year few days ago and so, New Year = new resolutions! What are your resolutions? I've thought it through & I have a rough idea on what my resolutions will be. Some of my resolutions are personal & kind of embarrassing but come on, this is my site & I can upload whatever I want. So below are my resolutions:

1) Gain self-confidence & self-esteem. Have more confidence in myself, love & accept myself for who I am.
2) Spend more time with my loved ones; family, friends & best friends
3) Lose weight, lead a healthy lifestyle
4) Do well for my Diploma & graduate
5) Start saving up
6) Travel to Bangkok
7) Travel with friends
8) Reduce cursing & swearing
9) If there's fate, meet the right guy & have a relationship

So yeap, that's all for now folks! I shall add on when I have more resolutions. GOODNIGHT WORLD! ❤

Well hello 2013

Whoa, i can't believe that i've not been updating for a very long time! My last update was 4 months ago! Anyway,

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL YOU HUMAN BEINGS WHEREVER YOU ARE!

Time really pass by very swiftly! In just a blink of an eye, a year has already passed & it's already the start of a new year. It's pretty scary when you think about how fast time seems to fly. Don't you think so? Don't you find it scary? No? Well i do. Wanna know why? As time passes by, from one year to another year to another, you are actually growing older too and there are much more things that you need to worry about; health, financial, family, etc.

It stresses me up just by thinking about the new year. New year = A year older & closer to the age where the term 'MARRIAGE' is so common around you. Relatives will start questioning you. The most common question that they'll ask, " When will it be your turn to walk down the aisle?"  Ergh, these kind of questions annoys the hell out of me. Can't they just mind their own business? I AM STILL YOUNG OKAY! I'm still 21 years old! Just the thought about it makes me mega annoyed. Okay, i shall move to another topic then.

Anyway, I still can't believe that it's already 2013. Although 2012 has passed, the memories still remains. Let's reflect back on the highlights & struggles that i faced in 2012. 

2012 wasn't fantastic but i have to say that it was a good year but also filled with bittersweet memories. Let's look at some of the highlights.

15th January 2012: Simple Plan live in Singapore

Saw Simple Plan live in concert for the first time in my entire life after such a long wait!  *cries* They were awesomely incredible that night! Dear Simple Plan, please come back to Singapore soon!

2nd April 2012: We Are The In Crowd Live in Singapore

Met the entire band, managed to get hugs & take a picture with each and every one of them. Saw them play in Singapore for the very first time & they were mad awesome. They have to come back to Singapore!

Graduation

I graduated from Republic Polytechnic with a Diploma in Technology & Arts Management. It was a really tough journey but i did it. We did it!

 

Employment 

I was employed by NTUC First Campus upon graduation & was attached to My First Skool. I am blessed to be attached to Yung An & have the opportunity to work with the bunch of wonderful & amazing people under the supervision of our wonderful Principal, Miss Zalina.

I MET CHUCK COMEAU

 Chuck Comeau, drummer from the band Simple Plan dropped by Singapore for Music Matters & he was invited to 987fm studio for an interview & so we managed to meet him after the interview. Such a nice & humble young man. I love you Chuck!

14th - 15th July 2012: Star Concert with BOYS LIKE GIRLS

This was probably the best weekend of my entire life. Welcomed the boys of Boys Like Girls at the airport although we didn't know their flight details. Headed to Gardens By The Bay for site-recce but ended up witnessing their soundcheck all thanks to the kind lady who happens to be the organizer. Paul & Morgan jumped off the stage & personally gave us guitar pick during the sound check. The boys performed extremely well during the STAR concert. They played my favourite songs that i've been dying to watch them play live. The night ended perfectly well with hugs from the boys. ♥ BLG BLG BLG! WOOOO!

 Hari Raya Aidilfitri 2012 

Last year's Hari Raya has got to be the most meaningful & memorable one because it was our last Hari Raya with my late uncle. I hope you are happy up there Pak Ngah. You'll always be remembered; in our hearts & in our minds. 

 KL Birthday retreat

Had a simple & meaningful birthday celebration with the family at KL this year. Simplicity at its best.

Dinner & Dance

First ever experience going for a company's dinner & dance. Although the Dinner & Dance was boring, i still had fun with my lovely girls. <3 span="span">

KL Christmas Retreat

Lastly, the most recent highlight of my 2012, KL Christmas Retreat with the family! I love you guys so much! More retreats soon okay?!  <3 br="br">